Setting the Date and Quelling the Beast-Bride: A 2-Year Long Engagement

I wasn't that little girl who planned her wedding when she was eight. In fact, up until I met Mr. Seal, I was pretty convinced that I would end up an old spinster with 18 mange-ridden cats. So, that being said, even though I was (and still am) desperately excited to marry Mr. S and anxiously awaited the engagement, I was a tiny bit frightened that I didn't possess the "bride gene".

I did, however, manage to come across this picture of little me dressed as a bride—perhaps early evidence of bridal DNA?:

Once I hit 23, it seemed like more and more people I knew were getting engaged. One of my best friends (and bridesmaids) was proposed to by her long-time boyfriend, and I think that's when I warmed up to the idea that I probably would marry after all. Then I met the Sealman and it very quickly hit me that I could see myself marrying him.

I'm going to be honest in saying that the bridal porn came before the engagement. Full of shame, hiding my bare left ring finger, I snuck into bookstores and bought bridal magazine after bridal magazine. I secretly pored over them while Mr. Seal was at work and tucked them safely under the bed before he returned. And this was only the beginning.

After the engagement, we lived up on Cloud 9 for a bit. Boy was it fun up there—so in love and oblivious to all that lay ahead! As mentioned in a previous post, we were engaged in mid December, and with Christmas, New Year's Eve and a trip to Disneyland to soon follow, we weren't immediately concerned with "figuring things out". Per previous discussions, we knew that we wanted a longish engagement, and didn't feel a pressing urgency to "set the date"—plus that love cloud was pretty comfy.

Post-Engagement, Pre-Planning Love Cloud/Disneyland Break. Can you spot the Seals?:

Upon returning, I climbed back down from the love cloud and realized that, not only did I have the bride gene, I had "bride" full on pumping through my veins.

The first thing we decided was when we wanted to get married. We tossed around December of 2011 but eventually settled on a quirky date. Mr. S and I are a bit funny and competitive when it comes to time—by that I mean we call each other when it's 12:34, or 11:11 and whoever makes notice of it first is deemed the "winner" by the other and is subject to taunting. So, once we realized 11/11/11 fell on a Friday we decided to roll with it (for the record: I realized 11/11/11 was a plausible wedding date before he did...score one for me).

January of 2010 was an incredibly exciting time. I went with my Auntie Mary Ann to my first bridal fair and with Mama Seal and Maid of Honor Meghan to the second. I'll admit I got a bit obsessed with the notice a bride gets at these things—dozens of people vying for your attention and handing you champagne, telling you that your ring is THE most beautiful one they've seen today.

On my way to/at my very first wedding fair at the Ritz Carlton in San Francisco:

After the second fair, I got anxious. I got tired of telling people "We're getting married November of NEXT year", and commonly getting the response, "Wow, well you've got PLENTY of time!" For some reason I suddenly didn't want plenty of time—I wanted 2010. It was as if I awakened a sleeping beast-bride version of myself—one who had been suppressed for far too long. I wanted to plan the wedding and marry Mr. Seal in 10 months and that was that. I was a fiend and a wedding was the only foreseeable fix!

Image via Wedding Planet Advice

Thankfully, my wonderful Mama and heroic Sealman pulled the bridal fair needle from my veins, slapped some water on my face and showed me the light. We were in no rush—and allotting ourselves that extra year of preparation would not only help lower stress levels, but it would extend my time as a bride. With the wedding addiction safely at bay we decided to stick with our original 11/11/11 date.

I feel safe in stating that settling on a 2-year engagement was the second best wedding-related decision we've made (second to getting married, of course). Year one has flown by in record time, and I am thoroughly enjoying every day. Sure stress occasionally rears its ugly head, but I couldn't imagine what a neurotic mess I would have been if we listened to that crazy beast-bride!

Did you opt for a long engagement and later question this decision? Did going to bridal fairs facilitate your wedding addiction?

Hugs and Kisses,

Miss Seal

(all personal photos unless stated otherwise)