Monday, May 9, 2011

You Got Me Trippin', Stumbling....

So most brides have some type of wedding nightmare at one point or another, right? I mean, Miss Waffle recently let us in on her recurring "ugly cry face" dreams and I suspect she isn't the only one to fall prey to the horrors of wedding nightmare-land. In fact, I know she's not. While I haven't yet had a UCF dream, I have had another form of wedding mishap continually permeate my dreams. Let me give you a bit of a background story first.

I'm not always clumsy, but let's say this: I've had my fair share of missteps. Quite literally. I've sprained my ankle dozens of times. (Sometimes my ankle just likes to buckle, what can I say?) Much to my luck, this often happens in front of other people. I try my best to laugh it off like, "Ha! I meant to trip on my right foot and fall to my knees. Ain't I a hoot?!" But let me tell you this, it is not so easy to play this off with grace when I get up limping (and occasionally bleeding if my knee is met with concrete).

Anyway, it doesn't stop there. I am going to tell you all a story that, despite having happened over ten years ago, still haunts me and makes me blush to this day. Where to start? Let's see. Back in the year 2000...

 Image via Scene SC/ Courtesy of NBC

(Sorry. Doesn't everyone think of Conan when you hear "in the year 2000"? If you don't know what I am talking about then you clearly need to see: this.)

So, anyhow, back in the year 2000, I accompanied Daddy Seal to the 1st Annual Latin Grammys. I was excited for multiple reasons: 1) I'd get to spend time with Daddy Seal, 2) the event was being held in LA which meant that I would be able to see the Southern California-based BM Carina, 3) 'NSYNC, 4) 'NSYNC and 5) 'NSYNC 

Yes, 'NSync. Yes, Justin Timberlake. They were scheduled to perform and I was PUMPED. My dad hooked it up for me and a few other friends to meet 'NSync the year prior and I relished another opportunity to make Justin Timberlake fall in love with me. (Psh, so what if I was only 15, Aaliyah said "age ain't nothin' but a number".)

Anyway, during dress rehearsals, BM Carina and I were walking down the halls of the Staples Center when we saw these two guys coming towards us:
 Image via Amazon/Edited by me

JT, perhaps preemptively attempting to quell the excitement of two teen girls coming in his direction, casually waved at us and winked. BM Carina, showing much more restraint than I, simply waved back. But what did Seal do? Well, I waited until JT was about an inch away from me before waving face palming him and screeching the ugliest and most awkward, "HI!" in the history of terrible greetings. CUE THE RED FACE. Justin responded with a "Whoooooa!" and, naturally, moved away from me as quickly as possible. 

Don't worry. Despite a firm brush with my hand, Justin's face survived and the group performed that evening as scheduled:

Video via YouTube

What does this have to do with my wedding nightmares? Well, I very rarely have recurring dreams but for about the last two months now, at least once per week, I dream that I am in our church (sometimes it's not actually the church we are getting married in) on our wedding day and walking down the aisle. "My side" of the pews is filled but on Mr. Seal's side there is only ever one person...and that person is Justin Timberlake. I am always so shocked by his presence that I have a difficult time walking and end up tripping and falling. Then everyone (including that jerk JT) bursts into laughter. (Occasionally, Zooey Deschanel is there to help me up, but who knows what that's about.)

I then wake up thrilled that I don't know JT and hug the sleeping Mr. Seal.

Though I don't have to worry about Justin Timberlake (or Zooey for that matter) making a guest appearance at our ceremony—I am now totally, paralyzingly terrified of tripping down the aisle. I do have a history of falling and making a fool out of myself, after all. Maybe I can convince Mr. Seal to walk down the aisle instead?

Do you have a recurring wedding-related nightmare? Has a past embarrassment come back to haunt you? Are you a clutz too?!

3 Comments:

Emu said...

You're going to be fine, and if you do fall then I promise:
a. not laugh
b. to help you up
c. to make sure you're dress isn't streaked with blood.

Obviously Zooey represents me. JT is there because you feel bad that you're marrying Shaun without first breaking your engagement to Brandon Boyd. Also because you know JT is your soul mate and you secretly don't want to give up on him.

Oh, and I fall down all the time so I know your pain (literally) I am also super spazzy and hopeless so I'm going to be concentrating really hard on not falling at your wedding also.

Really, just take your time walking, don't wave to anyone, and don't step on your dress and it will all be okay.

Emu said...

I had a really entertaining dream last night about the night before your wedding, which in the dream was also your bachelorette party. I'll spare you the details but it was basically the group drunkenly enjoying the city. It was quite magical.

Carina Conte said...

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I laughed so hard that I woke up Brandon! Hahahaha! That's one of my favorite memories!!!! God, I love you.